The trains have not been running successfully due to the strikes. I have resorted to using taxis in the morning to get to class and a bus in the afternoon to get back home.
It’s a chilly Friday – my friend, Rishi and I are walking to the bus stop. I feel something tugging gently at my jersey: a guy trying to take my phone, out of my pocket. Facing him, I feel someone else trying to open my backpack. Quickly, I pull my bag towards me and the guy who tried to take something strolls away. I focus my attention on the guy who still has his hand in my pocket. As our eyes meet, he looks at me with vacant eyes and gives me a shameful glance as he apologises and slowly walks away.
“What the f**k?!” is all I can say during this. After checking that I have everything, I walk Rishi to the corner and I rush to catch my bus home. On the bus, I sit there silently shaking, processing the fact that I almost got robbed. Travelling home, I have never felt lonelier and more at ease. In that moment, I was scared but fear was not going to control me. What surprised me was how fast I processed everything; I almost got robbed and then I ran for my bus because I could not get home late – too much work to do.
I thought I processed was happened, until I had a dream (two nights ago) that I was at the bus stop and the same guy who had his hand in my jersey stood there watching me. Taunting me.
Now, I understand why some people are so indifferent. We have no control over what happens to us, but how we react to it is entirely up to us. I’ve become more aware of my surroundings, I’m more cautious. My friend thinks it’s a good thing that I’m more alert but for me, it means that I’m less trusting of people. I guess I just need time to process things. If I want to help people, I’ll need to get to grips with reality. The brightly-coloured Wonderland that I’ve been living in has turned to fifty shades of grey and I need to decide if I want to repaint my world or let it shape me …
“Everything is changing,
And I’ve been here for too long
Going through the same things
I’ve been hurting too long,
Got to move on
Say I-I-I-I can’t do this anymore
If everything is changing
And I know, yeah, you gotta let go”
Changing by Sigma ft Paloma Faith
Let your minds wander at the endless possibilities of tomorrow
– Christine Diampovisa
*feature image – One day can change everything*